Sangent

submitted by Sang on 10.4.2008 in Jokes/Him and Her

Whatsamatta University’s Seminars For Men Fall Catalogue

Once again, the female staff at Whatsamatta University will be offering courses for men of all marital status in an attempt to help males and females understand each other better. Attendance in at least 10 of the following is required.

1. Combatting Stupidity

2. You Too Can Do Housework

3. Resistance to Beer

4. How To Properly Fill An Ice Tray

5. We Do Not Want Sleazy Underwear For Christmas (Give Us Credit Cards)

6. Understanding The Female Response To Coming Home Drunk At 4:00am

7. Wonderful Laundry Techniques (also called “Don’t Wash My Silks”)

8. Get A Life - Learn To Cook

9. How Not To Act Like An Idiot When You Are Obviously Wrong

10. Spelling - Even You Can Get It Right

11. Understanding Your Financial Incompetence

12. You, The Weaker Sex

13. Reasons To Give Flowers

14. Garbage - Getting It To The Curb

15. You Cannot Always Wear Whatever You Please

16. How To Put Down A Toilet Seat

17. Give Me A Break - Why We Know Your Excuses Are Lies

18. How To Go Shopping With Your Mate Without Getting Lost

19. The Remote Control - Overcoming Your Dependency

20. Helpful Posture Hints For Couch Potatoes

21. Mother-in-Laws Are People Too

22. The Weekend And Sports Are Not Synonymous

23. How Not To Act Younger Than Your Children

24. You Too Can Be A Designated Driver

25. Male Bonding: Leave Your Friends At Home

26. Attainable Goal - Omitting Foul Expletives From Vocabulary

27. You Don’t Really Need That Porsche

Whatsamatta University’s Seminars For Women Fall Catalogue

Once again, the male staff at Whatsamatta University will be offering courses for women of all marital status in an attempt to help males and females understand each other better. Attendance in at least 10 of the following is required.

1. Combatting The Impulse To Nag

2. You Can Change The Oil Too

3. How To Properly Fill A Beer Mug

4. We Do Not Want Ties For Christmas

5. Understanding The Female Causes Of Male Drunkenness

6. How To Do All Your Laundry In One Load And Have More Time To Watch Football

7. Parenting - Your Husband Gave You Children So You Could Have Someone Other Than Him To Boss Around

8. How To Encourage Your Husband To Cook More And Be Able To Stomach His Slop

9. How Not To Sob Like A Sponge When Your Husband Is Right

10. Get A Life - Learn To Kill Spiders Yourself

11. Balancing A Checkbook - Even You Can Get It Right

12. Comprehending Credit Card Spending Limits And Financial Responsibility

13. You, The Whining Sex

14. Shopping - Doing It In Less Than 16 Hours

15. If You Want To Know How That Looks On You, Ask Your Mother

16. How To Close The Garage Door

17. If You Don’t Want An Excuse, Don’t Demand An Explanation

18. How To Go Fishing With Your Mate And Not Catch Pneumonia

19. Living Without Power Windows - How To Turn A Crank

20. Romanticism - The Whole Point Of Caviar, Candles, And Conversation

21. How To Retain Your Composure While Your Husband Is Relaxing By Himself

22. Why You Don’t Need To Invite Your Mother Over Every Weekend

23. Payday And Shopping Are Not Synonymous

24. How To Act Younger Than Your Mother

25. You Too Can Carry A Backpack

26. Female Friendship - Why Your Best Friends Are Not The Women Who Complain About You The Most

27. Learning To Appreciate The Beer Belly And Lard Butt Morphologies Of Men

28. Attainable Goal - Catching A Ball Before It Stops Moving

29. How To Close The Top On The Toothpaste

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Tags: college

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