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Archive for September, 2006
submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
PJ and Kai-Lee learn how a puppet can sit on a stool whithout the puppeteer being seen in this clip from the Jim Henson Play-Along Video “Neat Stuff”.
Now that you know, you can impress your friends.
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submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!”
In the beginning, God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man has rested.
My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog.
What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 drinks.
A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said “I haven’t eaten anything in four days.” She looked at him and said, “God, I wish I had your willpower.”
Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.
A man inserted an ad in the classified: “Wife wanted.” Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
First guy (proudly): “My wife’s an angel!” Second guy: “You’re lucky; mine’s still alive.”
How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry done for free.
Just think, if it weren’t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Then there was a man who said, “I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late.”
A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” And the father replied, “I don’t know son; I’m still paying.”
The bumper sticker read: “I lost 250 pounds in one day; I divorced her.”
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.
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submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
This referee sure has an interesting way of moving around the field.
I think the guy’s name is Graham Poll, but I don’t think Google agrees.
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submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
Jason Jones’s The Daily Show reports on why we should stop worrying about the United States-Mexico border problem and focus on the US-Canada border problem instead.
Someone forward this post to President Bush, so he can do something aboot it.
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submitted by Mitsubishi on 09.29.2006
Steven Colbert interviews Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak in one of the saddest interviews I’ve ever seen. It gets to the point that Steven questions whether he actually invented the computer. And after seeing this, can you blame him?
Aired on: 28/09/06
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submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
Video from the 09/28/06 episode of The Daily Show starts with a riff on the softball tactics of print media cover-stories in the U.S. compared to other countries.
Then, Jon Stewart jumps on the CNN, “I-Report” bandwagon. “With CNN’s I-Report, you’ll be able to tell your friends that your balls were on Wolf Blitzer’s head.”
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submitted by Sang on 09.29.2006
This term, a class with no boundaries, a teacher with no limits, and a subject so complex, it can’t be defined. Where will you be when it’s test time for…
AP CALCULUS: Third Period
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submitted by Mitsubishi on 09.28.2006
Close inspection of a compromise bill on detainee rights shows that the only The President of the United States will have the ability to define which detainee interrogation techniques are legal under the Common Article 3 of The Geneva Conventions. Harsh interrogation techniques such as waterboarding and stress position are considered forms of torture by many experts. However, the compromise reached be Republicans in the Senate gives the Bush Administration the power to legalize questionable form of torture interrogations.
In following video report, Jon Stewart, host of The Daily Show, highlights statements by Secretary Condoleeza Rice. In an interview with The New York Post, Rice attempted to cast doubt on President Clinton’s claim that the Clinton administration passed plans to the Bush Administration for combating Al Aqeda. Jon Stewart concludes that Rice’s attempted smearing of Bill Clinton may be be less than truthful.
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submitted by Sang on 09.28.2006
This is a real working number for you to call in and apologize to Stephen for however you’ve wronged him.
The phone number? 1-888-OOPS-JEW (or 1-888 667-7539).
I’ve tried this number several times, and have gotten busy signals each time. Maybe you’ll have better luck.
If you don’t, check out this video of Stephen promoting the number on his show while you wait.
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