Sangent

February 14th, 2006 at 21:07:53

I couldn’t resist but to shove in a political figure. Heh Heh.

My dearest George Bush,

Oh beautiful angel! How I yearn for your velvet touch and how my lips burn for your moist kiss which is sweeter then the nectar which drips from the earth’s most beautiful flower.

With sensual velvet kisses, with flames of passion, with lustful burning eyes I bathe this canvas in my love-soaked thoughts for you, and only you.

What person in their sane mind could resist those radiant blue pools which you call eyes? When I stare deep into them I feel hypnotised and often get the urge to jump into your pools. But I don’t think you would appreciate me stripping off and throwing myself naked against your eyeballs. That could hurt.

I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this but your beautiful white hair reminds me of sparkling Colgate toothpaste. Of course its not REAL toothpaste, otherwise it would be so easy to just dip the brush in your hair and clean those lovely pearly white teeth of yours.

Going out to nightclubs is a great experience with you. I love the way the bouncer always makes you get your ID card out, yet I can always get in without any trouble whatsoever. Oh I love pinching your cheeks and teasing you about that afterwards and calling you “babyface”!

Words alone cannot express how unique my love is for you. I love you, and you only, I swear that to you my love ….OK, perhaps I got a little too excited cos I also love my MP3 player which I love listening to when you are not around. Come to think of it I listen to it when you are around too, but thats besides the point. My point is that I love you and my love for you is unique (isn’t it weird how the word ‘unique’ and ‘eunuch’ sound the same? The word Unix also sounds similar, but ‘Chimpanzee’ doesn’t)

I really must tell you though, I absolutely adore your gorgeous bum! I think if God created something truly amazing, then its definitely gotta be your bum! I know some people say the same thing about horses and giraffes, but I think your bum exceeds anything else!

Anyhow my love, I must bring this letter to an end now. But I must tell you something. I’ve always wondered what you would look like in PVC underwear. I really think you would be the hottest thing on this planet in PVC underwear and you could easily overthrow any model out there! If you wear those for me, I promise to worship you and treat you like royalty (Just so long as you don’t make me clean your toenails with a toothbrush! I draw the line there).

I wish you the happiest Valentines Day ever, from the deepest depths of my soul which cries tears of blood for your gentle touch, my love. Help me vanquish this burning thirst!

Forever lost without you,

Dick Cheney

xxxoooxxx

February 14th, 2006 at 21:17:01

Haha, considering how Dick almost killed already, he really needs Georgie Porgie.

February 14th, 2006 at 21:18:19

ok, my bad, that comment did not turn out right. i’m just going to give up now.