submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
Here’s a picture of Evil Ronald McDonald.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
Posted in Jokes, Links
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
Here’s a picture of Evil Ronald McDonald.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
Posted in Jokes, Links
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
November first will be Black Tuesday for orthodontists. An Ohio orthodontist says the day after Halloween is the worst day of the year for his profession. Doctor Kenneth Lawrence expects to be getting plenty of calls to help trick-or-treaters who’ve mangled their braces on chewy candy.
Posted in Jokes, Life, Links, Uncategorized
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
Shows you random pictures of superhero costumes found with Google Image Search. Click the drop down box for the list of characters.
Try Supergirl. See something weird in the pool of images (no, I’m not talking about the dog).
+snguyen
Posted in Links
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
30 Gigs is another free email provider like Gmail, Yahoo!, and Hotmail. Unlike the last two, 30 Gigs gives you 30 gigabytes of space. I have a gmail account which gives me around 2659 MB of space (1 GB = 1024 MB) as I’m typing this. To put it in perspective, I am using 1% of my quota 23 MB/2659 MB, so having 30 gigs of space is a lot.
Anyway, if you’re interested in a 30 Gig account, follow this link: . It’ll take you straight to the registration page where you can sign up for an account. If the link doesn’t work anymore, post a comment, and I’ll email you one (I have 7 invites, but those can be duplicated by sending me one).
+snguyen
Posted in Links
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
There were eleven people hanging onto a rope that came down from an airplane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die.
No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, “I’ll get off.”
After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping.
Problem solved.
Posted in Jokes/Blondes, Jokes
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
A couple were driving to a church to get married. On the way, they got into a car accident and died. When they arrive in heaven, they see St. Peter at the gate. They ask him if he could arrange it so they could marry in heaven. St. Peter tells them that he’ll do his best to work on it for them.
Three months pass by and the couple hear nothing. They bump into St. Peter and ask him about the marriage.
He says, “I’m still working on it.”
Two years pass by and no marriage.
St. Peter again assures them that he’s working on it.
Finally after twenty long years, St. Peter comes running with a priest and tells the couple it’s time for their wedding.
The couple marry and live happily for a while. But after a few months the couple go and find St. Peter and tell him things are not working out, and that they want to get a divorce.
“Can you arrange it for us?” they ask.
St. Peter replies, “Are you kidding?!! It took me twenty years to find a priest up here. How am I gonna find you a lawyer?”
Posted in Jokes
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
Let’s wash the car.
Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken.
You can’t feed that to the dog.
That’s enough ketchup on those eggs.
No kids in the back of the pickup!
Wrasslin’s fake.
That Civil War documentary was excellent.
That aroma? I’m baking fresh bagels.
I’ve got a problem with people who still fly the Confederate flag.
Here are my keys, I’m too drunk to drive.
Baby… Those jeans are too tight.
Don’t tie it on top of the car.
Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
Trim the fat off that steak.
Why’d you cut the sleeves off your t-shirt?
Don’t spray primer there…
Put that dog on a leash!
New York City’s an ideal place to vacation.
My mobile home is clean AND storm proof.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
I wouldn’t drive an American make if you paid me.
I ain’t riding with you unless both headlights work.
It’s January, take the Christmas lights down.
Checkmate!
Posted in Jokes
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS: The only creatures you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.
HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.
Posted in Jokes
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submitted by Sang on 10.30.2005
NOTE: Before taking this test, make sure you have a pen and paper handy to keep score.
ENJOY!!!
(1) Ever laughed at someone else’s misfortune? 1 point
(2) Ever laughed at a physically or mentally handicapped person? 2 points
(3) Ever tried alcohol? 1 point
(4) Ever been drunk? 2 points
(5) Ever play drinking games? 2 points
(6) Ever fall down because you drank too much? 3 points
(7) Ever drink enough to throw up? 4 points bonus: throwing up on yourself or another person 1 point
(8) Ever wake up and not remember what you did the night before? 5 points
(9) Ever been forceably removed from a bar? 8 points
(10) Ever participated in/finished a pub brawl? 5 points
(11) Do you drink regularly, at least 3 times a week? 3 points bonus: 1 point for each additional day (max. 7 points)
(12) Ever fall asleep/pass out in a bar? 4 points
(13) Ever try pot, hash, magic mushrooms? 4 points for each one tried
(14) Do you do drugs regularly? 4 points bonus: at least 4 times a week 4 points
(15) Ever bought soft drugs? 4 points
(16) Ever sell drugs? 8 points
(17) Ever sell drugs to support a drug habit? 12 points
(18) Ever used barbituates? 8 points
(19) Ever used hallucinogens? 8 points
(20) Ever used narcotics? 10 points
(21) Ever been stoned or drunk for more than 48 hours? 8 points
(22) Ever been on a date? 2 points
(23) Ever been felt up, groped? 2 points bonus: to orgasm 2 points
(24) Ever had sexual intercourse? 6 points
(25) Ever had a bath or shower with the opposite sex? 5 points
(26) Ever paid for sex? 8 points
(27) Ever taken advantage of someone while they were stoned or drunk? 4 points
(28) Ever get someone stoned or drunk to obtain sexual favors and succeed? 8 points
(29) Ever engage in oral sex? 4 points bonus: to orgasm 2 points
(30) Ever engage in anal sex? 6 points bonus: to orgasm 2 points
(31) Ever engage in the 69 position? 4 points
(32) Ever contract an STD? 12 points
(33) Ever had sex without a contraceptive? 4 points
(34) Ever had or knowingly been responsible for an abortion? 12 points
(35) Ever had sex with two or more partners in a week? 4 points
(36) Ever had sex with more than one person at a time? 9 points
(37) Ever had sex in a public place? 6 points
(38) Ever had carpet burns in relation to a sexual act? 4 points
(39) Ever engage in sexual activity with a member of the same sex? 10 points
(40) Ever practiced bondage, masochism, or sadism for sexual gratification? 6 points
(41) Ever used sex toys? 6 points
(42) Ever pass out during sex? 5 points
(43) Ever been responsible for losing someone else’s virginity? 4 points
(44) Ever masturbated while talking on the phone? 3 points
(45) Ever bought something in a sex shop? 3 points
(46) Ever licked or have someone lick an eyeball? 1 point toes - 2 points ears - 1 point
(47) Ever have sex with a relative? 5 points
(48) Ever make soemone sleep in the wet spot? 6 points
(49) Does necrophelia, pedophilia, or beastiality turn you on? 20 points
(50) Ever been arrested? 8 points. bonus: if convicted - 7 points
SCORING:
0-20 A life with the church is too corrupt for you.
21-40 You barely make our scale.
41-60 Approaching normal, you aren’t much fun on a date.
61-100 Normal,you use your right hand like everyone else.
101-130 Above average, you’ve got a few tricks below the belt.
131-160 You’re enjoying life to the max.
161-200 You’re a danger to society. Who let you out on a day pass?
200+ You’re going straight to hell.
Posted in Jokes
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