Sangent

submitted by Sang on 07.1.2005 in Jokes

The other day as I was scrolling through the penile enlargement spam ads in my e-mail (I’m not the only one who get those, right? Right? Hello? Anyone?), I thought, “Gee, I wonder what these spam subject lines looked like way back in olden times. You know, before there were computers?” Hysterical list of Historical Spam Subject Lines:

• Order Your British Redcoats Playing Cards!
• Ogg, Please Read: Name-Brand Berries for Your Cave Paintings!
• Augmenteth Thy Codpiece!
• Can’t Start Smoking? We Can Help!
• Buy Your Own Continent With NO TRINKETS DOWN!!
• URGENT VIRUS ALERT! Don’t Open Your City Gates for Giant Wooden Horses!
• URGENT ASSIS-TANCE NEEDED BY MRS. JULIUS CAESAR WITH 800,000 SESTERCES GOLD
• Feel young again, Lazarus!
• The HOTTEST Puritan Women Taking Their Bonnets Off Just For YOU!!!
• Take Inches Off Your Waistline! New Corset Works Miracles!
• Discount Maile-Order Leeches Delivered By Plaine Browne Buggy To Your Home — Without a Barber’s Prescription!
• You, Too, Can Work From Your Teepee!
• It’s August 1929: Do You Know Where Your Money Is? HOT!! Stock Tips Inside!—–>

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