Sangent

Archive for June, 2005

Navigate

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

Ol’ Fred

Ol’ Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them.

As the preacher stood next to the bed, Ol’ Fred’s condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on.

The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Ol’ Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died.

The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket.

At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Ol’ Fred died. He said, “You know, Ol’ Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven’t looked at it, but knowing Fred, I’m sure there’s a word of inspiration there for us all.”

He opened the note, and read, “Hey asshole, you’re standing on my oxygen tube!”


Posted in Jokes  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

Could a computer coding job paying just $15 per hour signal something’s wrong with the tech world? That relatively measely amount is what’s promised in an ad for a “ASP.NET Programmer” on the America’s Job Bank site. The job, which calls for “at least 1 year’s experience either in school, at work, or a combination of the two,” is…

read more | digg story


Posted in Life  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

…listed in reverse order because WordPress likes it that way.

  1. Eight hour lunch, two dollar tip.
  2. Ask, “Excuse me, are you a really bad singer, or a really bad actor?”
  3. After he describes each special, you shout, “Garbage!”
  4. Whenever he walks by, cough and mutter, “Minimum wage.”
  5. Every few seconds, yell, “More waffles, Cuomo!”
  6. Insist that before ordering, you be allowed to touch the London broil.
  7. Tie tablecloth around neck and say, “You wouldn’t charge Superman for dinner, would you?”
  8. Every time you eat or drink, cough really hard.
  9. As he walks by to the kitchen, scream, “He’s gonna spit in the chowder!”
  10. Three words: eat the check.

Posted in Jokes  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny.

"None, they all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking." Then Little Johnny says, "I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well I suppose the one that’s gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

"The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on…but I like your thinking."


Posted in Jokes  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say, “Jesus is watching you!”

Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again.

“Jesus is watching you,” the voice boomed again.

The burglar stopped dead again. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot.

He asked the parrot, “Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?”

“Yes,” said the parrot.

The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, and asked the parrot, “What’s your name?”

“Clarence,” said the bird.

“That’s a stupid name for a parrot,” sneered the burglar. “What idiot would name a parrot Clarence?”

The parrot said, “The same idiot who named the Rottweiller Jesus.”


Posted in Jokes  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.30.2005

A woman goes into a restaurant in a small southern town out in the country. She orders the fried chicken and starts to eat. Eating too fast, she chokes on a chicken bone.

Well, these two country boys in the next booth notice she is choking, and they get up and go over to help her. The first country boy drops his coveralls and bends over, and the second country boy starts licking his butt.

She pukes all over the place, dislodging the chicken bone from her throat. The country boy pulls his coveralls back up and says to the other excitedly, “You’re right Billy Bob, that Hind-Lick Maneuver works like a charm.”


Posted in Jokes  email this post email  submit comment »

submitted by Sang on 06.29.2005

Buy a qualifying Mac with your everyday education discount before September 25, 2005, and you’ll get a free iPod mini after mail-in rebate. And if you shop online at the Apple Store for Education, you can have your iPod mini engraved free.

read more | digg story


Posted in Links  email this post email  4 comments »

submitted by Sang on 06.28.2005

All the games on Sangent (as of 6.28.05). Simply find your favorite on the list, click it, and play it. Simple. Now, stop searching for games with the search box. They’re all listed in the games section.

12 Hole Xmas, 3D Pong, 3D Space Skimmer, 3D Tunnel, 3D Worm, 3D-SFCave, 501 Dart Challenge, 9 Ball, Absolutist Black Jack, Adrian’s Battle Bots, Aga Maza, Air Attack, Air Dodge, Air Heads, Airfox, Albatros Overload, Ant City, Artic 3D Racer, Avalanche, Ball Revamped: Metaphysik, Balloon Drop, Balloon Duel, Balloon Hunter, Balls ‘N’ Walls, Ball, Banana Barrage, Batman, Battle Snake, Battle Tanx 2, Battleships, Bloody Pingu, Bomberman, Bouncer, Bowman, Breakout 360, Bubbles, Bug Time, Bump Copter 1, Bump Copter 2, Bumperball, Camper Strike, Cannon Blast, Canyon Glider, Chinese Checkers, City Jumper, Colosseum Blackjack, Connect 4, Create a Ride, DTunnel, Deanimator, Defend Your Castle, Destroy All Humans, Destruction Derby, Detonator, Disc Golf, Dr. Dentist, Drag Racer v3, Driver’s Ed, El Emigrante, Falldown, Fat Boy Raids Cookie Factory, Fishy, Flamingo Drive, Flash Strike, Fly Plane, Fowl Words, Frogger, Fulltime Killer, Galatic Tennis, Geography Game: Africa, Geography Game: Canada, Geography Game: Europe, Geography Game: Middle East, Geography Game: US, Gold Miner, Granola, Gravity Ball, Gyroball, Hangman++, Heli Attack 3, Helicopter Game, Holy Cow, Ice Breakout, Jetslalom, Jurassic Pinball, Kill Mosquito, Kitten Cannon, Lander 2: Lunar Rescue, Lunar Command, Magnetism, Marbles, Mario Starcatcher 2, Mario Video Poker, Mario World: Overrun, Megaman Project X, Microlife, Milk Panic, Mini Golf, Mini Pool 2, Mini Putt 1, Mini Putt 2, Mini Putt 3, Monster Bash, My House, Nabisco Bowling, Net Blazer, Nordic Chill, Orca Slap, Pacman, Panda Golf, Paper Toss, Parallel Parking, Parking Garage, Pearl Diver, Pegz, Pingu Throw: High Score Edition, Pingu Throw, Plumber 1, Plumber 2, Poom, Powerfox 3, Powerfox, Quick Draw, Reaction Effect, Reaction, Realistic Internet Simulator, Rodeo, Rooftop Skater, Rumble Ball, Rural Racer, Seal Bounce, Shoot Rat, Shooting the Fly, Shoplifter, Short Bus Rampage, Shotgun: Defend the Flag, Simon, Skeet Shoot, Ski 2000, Skidoo TT, Skull Kid, Slide Out, Slime Soccer, Snake Jump, Snow Drive, Snow Plow, Snowball Bash, Snowball Warrior, Snowball, Snowboard, Snowcraft, Sobics School, Space Escape, Spacerunner, Spec Ops, Speedy Bubbles, Squares, Starship Eleven, Steady Mouse, Sub Commander, Super Fishing, Super Mario Rampage, Tank Ball, Tanks, Tetris A, Tetris, Tetrocollapse, The Classroom 1, The Classroom 2, The Daring Dozen, The Real Gilligan’s Island: Mini Golf, The Scratchpad, Tightrope Walk, Toboggan Jump, Top Banana, Traffic Control 2, Tunnel 2, Tunnel Racer, Turtle Bridge, Ultimate Dodgeball, Ultimate Flash Sonic, Verti Golf 1, Verti Golf 2, Wakeboarding, Windmills, World’s Smallest Asteroids Game, World’s Smallest Pacman, World’s Smallest Pong, World�s Smallest Breakout, World�s Smallest 3D Game, World�s Smallest Football, World�s Smallest Life Game, World�s Smallest Pinball, World�s Smallest Racing Game, X-Bound

Thank you.

+snguyen


Posted in Site News  email this post email  4 comments »

submitted by Sang on 06.28.2005

As the title states 6 Free Issues of Macworld!

read more | digg story


Posted in Links  email this post email  3 comments »

Navigate blog